|Rambling thought on how white men, or men in general, do not own the future.
||[Feb. 6th, 2016|12:42 pm]
Greetings Fellow Comstoks!
When I was tiny, my Dad got one of the first home model Betamax and introduced it to us with a bootleg copy of Star Wars. We then continued to use this all metal behemoth (with fake wood accents) until the tracking was so bad one could only see a third of the screen. This was a result not of being natural late adopters, but the Fengi family parsimony which has ensured my parents can still afford their old age even after the financial meltdown, so I have no problem with this.|
When it came to the info age, however, Mom was the one who got the computer and learned basic programming - in part because it was necessary to her career as librarian. Mom also returned to college and re-entered the workforce soon after having kids at a time when it was no longer unique but not as common as it would become - and Dad was, in hindsight, modern in how he supported her as an equal partner without any apparent struggle.
It is significant, I think, that substantial portion of my exposure to the modern or just brain expanding concepts has been through women. The one bona fide punk rocker in my high school - who knew more than Anarchy in The UK - was a girl. A key turning point in my musical tastes becoming less narrow was Laurie Anderson. The first time I used a chat feature - pre-net on the university's networked computers - I discovered it with a wry female pal. The first time I viewed "the web" through a browser, a woman I was dating showed me Mosaic on her mom's computer (she was an adult living at home for the same reasons millennials do now). Half of the teachers in my major were women and the biggest advocate of paying attention to new tech was a woman. The co-worker who explained CompuServe to me, the manager of the internet cafe which hosted my first email address and the boss who let me take home a discarded computer that allowed me to go online for home for the first time were all women. The first hardcore cell phone user I knew personally was a woman. Hell, the TV I owned for years after college was a black and white set a girlfriend salvaged from the trash. Deadend Margo had a smart device well before I did and my first device was a gift from her.
My presence on Livejournal, the first social network I actually used beyond setting up a profile, came through reading my real life acquaintance who then gave me an invite code (in the last year that was still require). My paid account started as a gift from some woman I barely knew who rewarded promising new users. And the reason I knew was through the poetry world, which I had entered on my own but gained access to the national scene thanks to a cadre of talented activist women.
A turning point in my politics involved being recruited into the re-election campaign by the essentially Marxist Alderman Helen Shiller by women who were even further to the left than her.
My life is not a feminist ideal, it's patriarchal in many ways from many of my favorite art/entertainment to whatever good fortune I've enjoyed to my flaws. Maybe a certain sense of privilege is why I'm not anxious or resentful that my experience of what I consider positive, progress, the avant garde or at least the more interesting aspects of life involves diversity of all sorts, but particularly the idea that women are equally engaged by everything with wit and enthusiasm and skill. That doesn't seem like a threat, it seems beneficial and in the 21st century unremarkable, how life should be. That women don't have an equal share of all power and resources seems like a key problem (though hardly the only one).
I think I'm being genuine in saying I'm alienated more than ever by the current wave of rabid, enraged male resentment. It's not new, I've encountered all my life, even within myself. I also think all humans have moments of anxiety about their own status and people unlike themselves. The more you put that shit out there rather than deal with it, however, the more it is a defining mindset. And white guys have always had enjoyed most leeway to express and therefore embrace it. So the ever expanding communication tools mean every dude's aggressive anxious acting out, be it a momentary failure of perspective or hardcore stance, feeds a collective King Asshole out to crush women, minorities and women minorities especially.
And this male entitled sewage is at odds with my own life. Like fuck those guys. If you think you need a special clandestine meetup to whine about the fuck objects you hate not behaving as you want, you've pretty much lost touch with reality and the actual problems and joys of the world. I realize this not much of a coherent ending or essay, but it's what was on my mind.